Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara, as beautiful and meaningful is the essence behind the sentence, so was the movie. This movie was the reason many millennials created their bucket lists or completed them with one last wish or maybe two. It recently completed a decade in our hearts and was made forevermore our escape to the land of laughs, self-love, memories, and a path of finding and forgiving yourself.
The story was simple, 3 friends, on a road trip to Spain. Only the road, some crazy dancing along the way, and…our dear fancy Bagwati!
I mean what could go wrong, right? #vibecheck
Self-love is forgiveness:
What’s a great memorable journey without some drama?
Do you remember the scene where Imran tosses Arjun's phone down the cliff? “It’s not funny, Imran! Throwing my phone wasn’t funny, getting involved with my girlfriend wasn't funny!”
Arjun was stewing in his unresolved emotions for the past 4 years and it only brought him pain. He rightly said, “jab tak yaha se na nikal jaye tab tak ”, pointing towards his heart.
Arjun finally fell in love with himself when he could accept that he had just not found the right partner yet who wouldn’t cheat on him and the fact that her actions don't reflect his self-worth!
and when it got out it not just mended their relationship it also brought clarity within both of them, also Arjun was finally given the relief of finding himself enough and worthy of love for his future.
After the smoke lifted from the little feud between Arjun and Imraan that was pent up for four years finally found an outlet and when got out, gave rise to forgiveness, mended relations, and self-love. Arjun’s take on the fight was legit but in the process not only was the friendship harmed but so was his mental peace.
2. Self-love is just... living!
I love the unpredictability of life. The arrival of the ‘women at the beach’, Laila, their deep-sea diving instructor. It was such an unexpected (and magical) turn.
QUICK!! act surprised!!
Arjun, living life at a frantic pace and in a constant rate of competition, had an image to maintain of a big-shot trader who knew that the world ran on nothing but money and while joking around on the topic of marriage, he admitted marrying solely because of money, but sometimes we must learn to turn off the autopilot that’s steering us in an endless loop; that’s exactly what Laila was trying to teach Arjun that living life to enjoy is not a crime. “Seize the day my friend!”, “How do you know that you’ll be alive by the age of 40? Live this day to the fullest and then think about 40!”, because Zindagi ACTUALLY mein nahi Milegi Dobara (you only live once!).
and she was right every step of the way. Adventures don’t knock on your doors, you have to kick open that door, push yourself, and shout…MOSHI MOSHI!!!!!
and you know what sometimes it’s these adventures that help us find ourselves again.
3. Self-love is prioritizing yourself
There is a powerful Japanese saying, “Mens Sana in corpore Sano” -a sound mind in a sound body (Ksenia consultation teaches this in Do-Over program); It reminds us that both mind and soul are important and the health of one is connected to the other.
Have you ever thought about what happened to Arjun that made him cry after the dive? It was peace! overwhelming calmness that, when attained made the pent-up frustration seep out of the cracks.
When you do something for yourself; the love and peace that follows is something that can even make a grown man cry, and that’s OK!
The dive brought out those scars and unanswered questions to the surface. And just like Laila said, “diving is like meditation for me!” and a pit stop for our 24/7 working mind is meditation and a moment of self-love and self-appreciation.
4. Self-love is sometimes, a beautiful mystery:
The reckless, fun-loving and impulsive Imran reflected upon his past mistakes and mended his ties with Arjun upon getting closure from his biological father who abandoned him at the time of his birth.
Simply accepting life as it was, and making peace with it. Accepting, that in life, you cannot make everyone like you is the BEST REMEDY for self-esteem building and self-love (this and many more of our tips and learnings from our self-love workshop) because you cannot fill from an empty vessel and honestly getting too consumed for validation from others will only sink you in deeper and make you lose the essence of your confidence and self-image.
If looked at from a distance everyone’s life seems so sorted and figured out and when you finally get to know them better you realize that they are just as confused and lost as you are, they just hide and conceal it better!
5. Self-love is self reflect
Soon-to-be-married Kabir broke off his engagement upon the realization that his supposed significant other wasn’t compatible with him.
Why the sudden change?
Why now?
Why not when he was on his knees proposing to her?
Whatever happened in that two-week trip?
To answer, “Why now?” simply because by this time he finally knew what he wanted because he had finally found and understood-HIMSELF.
Him, realizing what he was, gave way for the realization of him knowing what it is that he wanted exactly, which was, NOT this marriage!
6. Self-love is YOU:
There is no future, no past. There is only the present. You feel the snow, the rain, the skies, in the NOW; your body and your consciousness, united as a single entity.
Self-reflection brought us to the realization that doing something you love makes you want to live a hundred years. And you might have missed it, the movie reveals THE great secret to living life, “Just keep breathing!”, (golden words of)- Arjun.
Take that risk, take that offer, break off that toxic relationship.
Keep yourself and your mental peace foremost for the sake of YOURSELF.
A full disclosure: no one cares for no one, there’s only each person for themself. You come in the world all alone and you’ll be gone alone; what matters is what you make of it in the time you grace the grounds of the earth. And you know what, because of this pandemic we’ve realised, even that isn’t enough. We have been prone to anxiety, stress, depression, and overthinking.
So live, laugh, love, because Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara to love yourself.
Don't know how to take the first step towards yourself?
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